


Tooms

by 30xf



Series: 201 Days Of X Files [21]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: Mild Gore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-21
Updated: 2015-09-21
Packaged: 2018-04-22 18:30:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4845863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/30xf/pseuds/30xf





	Tooms

First of all, I'm glad Mulder is alive. Second of all, I'm glad this isn't my car. Mulder smells--bad--and it's certain to linger in this upholstery long after he's dropped me off at my apartment and returned this car to the FBI's fleet of sedans. It'll take some thorough cleaning before this one gets signed out again. Later I'll struggle to describe just how bad the smell is ("You know when a baby throws up on you and you don't get a chance to change right away and the smell just lingers around you like Pigpen's cloud of dust? Yeah, multiply that by about 84"), but at the moment, I'm doing my best to pretend it doesn't smell as bad as it does.

"Sorry," he says for the dozenth time, and turns the fan up another notch. All four windows are down and the vents are now pulling in outside air at their maximum potential. 

"It's not your fault," I remind him, turning the vents down a couple of clicks. It's chilly out, and the vents are blowing so much air at my face, I won't be able to blink for days.

He looks at me out of the corner of his eye, seeming to question my actions, but doesn't ask. "You wanna help me burn these clothes?" he asks with a chuckle.

"No offense, but once I get out of this car, I intend to never go near those clothes again. But I fully support your decision to burn them," I say, amused. He managed to get the bile off of his face and hands in the mall bathroom while the police were discussing how to clean the remains of Eugene Tooms out of the escalator. When we left they were wondering if bringing in a power washer might be the best idea. To be fair, I might have waited for Tooms to appear and then just shot him. But I wasn't the one down there, so I'm not in a position to question why Mulder chose instead to turn on the escalator once I had safely helped him out of it. In all honesty, I think he questioned it himself as we laid there on the floor, listening to agonized screams quieting down as the amount of blood and tissue on the escalator increased. 

"I think my priority is going to be getting this shit out of my hair," he muses, almost reaching up to touch it, but stopping himself.

"There's a lot of acid in bile, you might want to do a deep conditioning treatment too," I say before I can stop myself. It is possibly the strangest medical/beauty advice I've ever given. 

He looks at me fully and I can't tell if he's marveling at my odd advice as well, or simply wondering what a deep conditioning treatment involves. He pulls up in front of my building and puts the car in park. "I won't blame you if you run screaming from this car," he tells me.

"It's not that bad," I lie.

"Yes it is."

Silence descends for a moment as we both get lost in thought. We haven't mentioned our previous unexpectedly meaningful car conversation, and I don't think we're about to. It's in the back of both of our minds, and I think that's where it'll stay. I'll most likely never tell him that before I grabbed him the root beer, I had an iced tea in my hand. He'll most likely never tell me the real reason he doesn't want me calling him Fox. Some things are better left unsaid.

"I was fully prepared to go in there after Tooms, you know," I tell him quietly.

He nods, avoiding my eyes. "I know you were. Probably would have finished him off a little more, uh...cleanly than I did too."

"You finished him off just fine," I tell him. It's a weird thing to say, but I think he knows what I mean by it. 

Another nod, and he finally looks up at me. "You wanna hug it out?" he asks, arms out a little and an impish grin playing at his lips.

"Not a chance," I laugh, getting out of the car. "See you in the morning, if you're done showering by then."


End file.
